::Still growing
10:36 p.m. - 2005-07-06
My 4th of July was ok. I saw fireworks for the first time in like three or four years. It was so pretty! It would have been better if my mom hadn't been sending bad vibes.
You how when a person is in a bad mood it broadcasts to other people? Well, that was what she was doing.
I think it's because she's used to having dad all to herself every summer (been like that for about 11 years, this would have been the 12th) and she doesn't like that I'm here. Dad swears it isn't that but I know they fight becasue of me and everything.
Mom and dad fight a lot and they've come close to spliting up a few times but they haven't followed through. Mom has been in a really bad mood lately and it's really hard for dad and I to handle. He makes comments but he doesn't ever do anything!
I'm tired of bending over backwards to suit her when she doesn't do the same for me.
Does all this make me selfish?
My friends all have things that have happened to them to make them grow and change. I'm being left behind and I don't like that. I want to grow up but I don't want to stop being a kid.
Paradox,oxymoron whatever!
